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Masculinity And Femininity

020901PM Prayer-11 GDGW-29

Growing Dads God’s Way-29

The Most Powerful Tools in

Godly Parenting: Prayer – 11

“PRAYING THAT THEY LOVE THE WAY GOD MADE THEM AND BOYS AND GIRLS”

Part Two

DWM-22  WFP-24

As the world crumbles, as society disintegrates, and roles and genders are obliterated – God’s Word stands. As even the Christian community erases masculinity from the Bible versions, and families abdicate God’s standards for the family – the Christian Home is getting harder and harder to build. But one truth remains, God has promised His blessing on those who will believe Him enough to obey Him!

 

Now comes the challenge. Parents, do you know what God wants from your sons as men and from your daughters as women? In some areas the Lord wants similar character for boys and girls, but in most areas, His plan for a young lady GREATLY DIFFERS from His plans for young men.

 

The Lord Almighty, God of the Universe has made men and women differently, with different qualities, different roles, and different purposes within His great plan. So, again I ask from God’s Word — Parents, do you know what God wants from your sons as men and from your daughters as women? As we walk through many passages in the Scriptures this morning we will see a portion of God’s wondrous plan. And we will see anew and afresh that praying, teaching, and modeling the Word of God is the key to raising, nurturing, and launching children that please the Lord. We need to be learning how to pray for our children from the Scriptures.

 

Please stand and listen to the Lord speak from Psalm 139.13-18.

 

WE MUST PRAY FOR REALITY IN THEIR SPIRITUAL LIFE:

  1. SEEING THEM GENUINELY SAVED.
  2. SEEING THEM LOVING GOD’S WORD.
  3. SEEING THEM LIVING IN VICTORY.
  4. SEEING THEM THINKING OF HEAVEN.
  5. SEEING THEM FINDING SIN REPULSIVE.
  6. SEEING THEM STAY TENDER TOWARD GOD.

 

WE MUST PRAY FOR INTEGRITY IN THEIR PERSONAL LIFE:

  1. SEEING THEM MAINTAINING A CLEAR CONSCIENCE.
  2. SEEING THEM LEARNING TO STAND ALONE.
  3. SEEING THEM SEEKING TO STAY PURE.
  4. SEEING THEM CULTIVATING A SERVANT’S HEART.
  5. PERSONAL INTEGRITY MEANS SEEING THEM NEVER BECOMING BITTER IN TRIALS.

 

WE MUST PRAY FOR STABILTY IN THEIR RELATIONAL LIFE

  1. RELATIONAL STABILITY MEANS SEEING THEM CULTIVATING A LOVE FOR THEIR BROTHERS AND SISTERS.
  2. RELATIONAL STABILITY MEANS SEEING THEM LEARNING TO TRUST GOD WITH HARD SITUATIONS AND NOT TO REBEL.
  3. RELATIONAL STABILITY MEANS SEEING THEM EACH LOVING THE WAY GOD MADE THEM AS MEN AND WOMEN.

 

Psalm 139:13-18 For You formed my inward parts; You covered me in my mother’s womb. 14 I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Marvelous are Your works, And that my soul knows very well. 15 My frame was not hidden from You, When I was made in secret, And skillfully wrought in the lowest parts of the earth. 16 Your eyes saw my substance, being yet unformed. And in Your book they all were written, The days fashioned for me, When as yet there were none of them. 17 How precious also are Your thoughts to me, O God! How great is the sum of them! 18 If I should count them, they would be more in number than the sand; When I awake, I am still with You. (NKJV)

 

Each of us are the handiwork of God, like spiritual snowflakes, no two exactly alike.

Each of us are like rare and precious jewels, no one is worthless or unimportant in God’s plan.

 

So how should we direct, train, and guide our young men and women as specifically designed by God? Of course, using the Scriptures. Turn with me now and note how specifically the Lord has directed our young men and young women to be – so they can please God by their lives, their choices and their conduct. The key is that more is caught (discipleship) than taught (lecture). Fathers and mothers, what YOU ARE is very much what THEY WILL BECOME!

 

 

1 Timothy 2:8

I desire therefore that the men pray everywhere,

lifting up holy hands,

without wrath and doubting;

 

  • “pray everywhere” YOUNG MEN SHOULD SEE THEIR FATHERS as MEN OF PRAYER at the table, at bed time, before school, before travel, on the road, alone, in public. Godly fathers just pray EVERYWHERE!
  • “lifting up holy hands” YOUNG MEN SHOULD SEE THEIR FATHERS as MEN OF PURITY. When their hands, and lives, and secrets are exposed all that shows are holy hands, cleansed and kept pure by a Spirit filled walk!
  • “without wrath” YOUNG MEN SHOULD SEE THEIR FATHERS as MEN OF PATIENCE. The fruit of the Spirit is long suffering patience that grows and takes over my responses!
  • “without doubting” YOUNG MEN SHOULD SEE THEIR FATHERS as MEN OF FAITH. Believing God’s Word enough to live it!

 

1 Timothy 2:9-10

in like manner also, that the women adorn themselves in modest apparel,

with propriety and moderation,

not with braided hair or gold or pearls or costly clothing,

but, which is proper for women professing godliness, with good works.

 

GOD’S DESIRE FOR WOMEN IS A GODLY ATTITUDE (I Timothy 2:9-10): Two attitudes ought to characterize your approach to worship: “modestly and discreetly” (v. 9). The Greek word translated “modestly” in verse 9 refers to modesty mixed with humility. At its core it connotes a sense[1] of shame—not shame in being a woman, but shame for in any way inciting lust or distracting others from a proper worship of God. A godly woman will do all she can to avoid being a source of temptation. The word also has the connotation of rejecting anything dishonorable to God. Some would even suggest it means “grief over a sense of sin.” A godly woman hates sin so much that she will avoid anything that can produce sin in others. Consider the following dictionary definitions:

 

  • YOUNG LADIES SHOULD SEE THEIR MOTHERS as “modest”: What is that? Moms that means they see you as having a regard for decencies of behavior or dress; quiet and humble in appearance, style, etc.; not displaying one’s body; not boastful or vain; unassuming; virtuous; shy or reserved; chaste.
  • YOUNG LADIES SHOULD SEE THEIR MOTHERS as “proper”: Moms that means they see you as having a specially adapted or suitable manner; appropriate; conforming to an accepted standard; correct; fitting; right; decent.
  • YOUNG LADIES SHOULD SEE THEIR MOTHERS as “discreet”: Moms that means they see you as having a lack of ostentation or pretension; showing good judgment; prudent; cautious; careful about what one says or does.

 

 

 

Titus 2:4-5

that they admonish the young women to love their husbands,

to love their children, 5 to be discreet, chaste, homemakers, good,

obedient to their own husbands,

that the word of God may not be blasphemed.

 

GOD WANTS YOUNGER WOMEN TO STAND OUT IN OUR CULTURE (Titus 2:4-5) The older women are to train the younger women “to love their husbands, to love their children, to be sensible, pure, workers at home, kind, being subject to their own husbands” (Titus 2:4–5). In our culture, that is the exact[2] opposite of what they are being taught. Women today are encouraged to love whomever they want, to farm out their children to someone else’s care and influence, and not to worry about being sensible or pure, but to do whatever pleases them in fulfilling their desires. “Younger women” refers to those women who are able to bear children or are still rearing children. Since women can bear children well into their forties and the main duties of raising a child last for about twenty years, a woman under sixty could be considered young in the biblical sense (1 Tim. 5:9). What qualities ought to characterize her life?

 

  1. YOUNG LADIES SHOULD SEE THEIR MOTHERS “love their husbands”: This word in the Greek text, philandros is translated “love their husbands.” Paul used the same terms to describe godly widows (1 Tim. 5:9). It means to be a one-man woman, totally devoted to her husband, and in tune with his needs, plans, and desires. Mothers, do your girls see this type of love in you?
  2. YOUNG LADIES SHOULD SEE THEIR MOTHERS as “a lover of children”: This characteristic is also one word in the Greek text, philoteknos, and it means to be a lover of children. As 1 Timothy 2:15 says, that is a woman’s highest calling. Obviously God doesn’t want all women to be mothers or they would be. Those women who have no children mean a great deal to God’s kingdom because He has given them freedom to serve in unique ways. God wants women who are mothers to love their children, which involves making personal sacrifices for the benefit of their children. Remember, loving your children is not based on emotion. Rather, it is your responsibility to pour yourself into your child’s life so that he or she grows up to love Christ. Mothers, do your girls see this type of love in you?
  3. YOUNG LADIES SHOULD SEE THEIR MOTHERS as “sensible”. Young women are to be taught to be sensible, a required characteristic of elders (1 Tim. 3:2) and older men (Titus 2:2). It refers to using common sense and making sound judgments. Those things are learned best by example, and that’s where the older women can have such an influence. Mothers, do your girls see this type of Spirit-controlled living in you?
  4. YOUNG LADIES SHOULD SEE THEIR MOTHERS as “pure”: Young women are to be morally pure, virtuous, and sexually faithful to their husbands. They are to be devoted to that one man in body and spirit. By what they read, and what they listen to, and what they watch on TV and movies, their lives should declare loyalty and devotion to a real man they live with not a dream or fantasy man that only exists in their minds.  Mothers, do your girls see this type of holiness in you?
  5. YOUNG LADIES SHOULD SEE THEIR MOTHERS as “worker at home”: A woman’s responsibility is in the home because it is the place where she can have the greatest impact on the world by raising godly men and women. GOD’S PLAN FOR WOMEN CENTERS AROUND THEIR HOME AND FAMILY: The phrase “workers at home” is translated from the compound Greek word oikourgos, which is derived from oikos (house) and a form of ergon (work). Ergon does not simply refer to labor in general; it often refers to a particular job or employment. It is the word Jesus used when He said, “My food is to do the will of Him who sent Me, and to accomplish His work” (John 4:34, emphasis added). Our Lord focused His entire life on fulfilling God’s will. In a similar fashion, a wife is to focus her life on the home. God has designed the family to be her sphere of responsibility. That doesn’t mean she should spend twenty-four hours a day there, however. The woman in Proverbs 31 left her home when she needed to buy a field or when she needed supplies, yet even those trips benefited her family. She poured her life into her family—she woke up early and went to bed late for the sake of those in it. Mothers, do your girls see this type of focus upon God’s will in you?
  6. YOUNG LADIES SHOULD SEE THEIR MOTHERS as “kind”: A young woman ought to be characterized by being gentle, tender-hearted, and merciful toward others. Mothers, do your girls see this type of spirit-filled kindness in you?
  7. YOUNG LADIES SHOULD SEE THEIR MOTHERS as “subject to their own husbands”: This echoes Paul’s instruction in Ephesians 5:22. A godly young woman understands God’s created order and submits to it (cf. 1 Cor. 11:5). Mothers, do your girls see this type of godliness in you?

 

 

Titus 2:6-8

6 Likewise, exhort the young men to be sober-minded,

7 in all things showing yourself to be a pattern of good works;

in doctrine showing integrity, reverence, incorruptibility,

8 sound speech that cannot be condemned,

that one who is an opponent may be ashamed, having nothing evil to say of you.

 

David Wilkerson the 71 year old author of the Cross and the Switch blade, and now for 16 years the pastor of Times Square Church gave this amazing testimony[3] to his church a few weeks ago:

 

Keep in mind, Jesus calls us “kings and priests unto God and his Father” (Revelation 1:6). And the apostle Peter reminds us, “Ye are a chosen generation, a royal priesthood…Ye also…are built up a spiritual house, an holy priesthood” (1 Peter 2:9, 5). I ask you, which priesthood describes your life: the godly Zadok priesthood, or the corrupt Eli priesthood? These two ministries represent two kinds of manifestations. And they represent Jesus to the world in two very different ways.
A HALFHEARTED MANIFESTATION OF JESUS IN THE HOME

PRODUCES A PASSIVE HEART IN THE CHILDREN.

 

It’s sad but true: many Christian parents are sending their kids straight to hell. Dad is to be the priest in the home. And Mother is a member of God’s royal priesthood too. So, which of these two priesthoods are you manifesting: Zadok’s or Eli’s?

For years I was a youth evangelist, traveling the nation and ministering to thousands of young people. During that time, I had conversations with many troubled teenagers from Christian homes. These kids were completely turned off to church. They wanted nothing to do with their parents’ religion. They spoke of their dad and mom’s angry fights, blatant hypocrisy, awful gossip, secret sins. They heard constant grumbling and complaints about their minister, church members, family, and friends.

Usually in such cases, the dad was active in church. People saw him as dedicated and full of Jesus. But his kids knew how to read his life, and they saw him as he really was: a phony. He mistreated their mother with abusive language. Or he had a secret stash of pornographic magazines. Or he was caught watching filthy videos.

Such a dad serves in the Eli priesthood. He has no spiritual authority. And in turn, he has no respect. He might lecture his kids, or threaten them, or try to demand obedience. But he’s wasting his breath. It’s all to no avail.

We see this illustrated in Eli’s life. Eli had two sons named Hophni and Phinehas, who also served as priests. God called these men “sons of Belial,” or children of the devil. Yet Eli never dealt with his sons about their sin. He never spoke to them more than an empty word of caution. After all, he knew anything he might say to them was in vain, because of his own spiritual sloth.

 

  1. YOUNG MEN SHOULD SEE THEIR FATHERS as “sensible in all things” (vv. 6–7a). We’ve seen Paul use this characteristic of elders, older men, and younger women. Young men need to develop self-control and balance, discernment and judgment (cf. 2 Tim. 2:22; 1 Peter 5:5). The phrase “in all things” stretches this matter of mental balance and self-mastery in the Christian life to an almost infinite level. Young men—so potentially volatile, impulsive, passionate, arrogant, and ambitious—need to become masters over every area in their lives. Fathers, do your boys see this type of Spirit-controlled living in you?
  2. YOUNG MEN SHOULD SEE THEIR FATHERS as “example of good deeds”: Paul turns from the young men in general to encourage Titus to “show [himself] to be an example of good deeds.” One of the most important qualities of a leader is the example he sets. Paul wanted Titus to be a model first of “good deeds.” That refers to his inherent righteousness, nobility, and moral excellence. A godly young man is to model righteousness in everything he does. Young men, you’ll begin to control your life when you understand God wants you committed to producing righteous, holy deeds. Fathers, do your boys see this type of Spirit-controlled living in you?
  3. YOUNG MEN SHOULD SEE THEIR FATHERS with pure motives: “with purity in doctrine” (v. 7) is how God wants those deeds accomplished. A better way to translate the Greek word is “uncorruptness.” Titus and young men are to live in perfect accord with sound doctrine, and without defect. Young men must know the Word of God and live according to it. Psalm 119:9 says, “How can a young man keep his way pure? By keeping it according to Thy Word.” Living in obedience to God’s Word will keep you in line. Fathers, do your boys see this type of holiness in you?
  4. YOUNG MEN SHOULD SEE THEIR FATHERS as “dignified”: At the end of Titus 2:7 Paul adds that Titus and young men are to be “dignified” —a characteristic that should also be true of men and women deacons and older men. That means young men are to be serious. Youth tends to be somewhat frivolous, particularly in our culture where entertainment has become an all-consuming passion. While that doesn’t mean young men can’t enjoy life, they should have a mature understanding of life, death, time, and eternity. Fathers, do your boys see this type of Spirit-controlled living in you?
  5. YOUNG MEN SHOULD SEE THEIR FATHERS with “sound speech”: Finally Paul encourages Titus to: “[Be] sound in speech which is beyond reproach.” As we’ve seen, “sound” means “healthy” or “wholesome.” In reference to one’s words, Paul wrote, “Let your speech always be with grace, seasoned, as it were, with salt, so that you may know how you should respond to each person” (Col. 4:6). Young men, let what you say be worth saying. Make sure it edifies your hearers to the point that it is “beyond reproach” —that the only accusations which can be brought against it are shameful in the light of reason.[4] Fathers, do your boys see this type of Spirit-controlled living in you?

 

Appendix of Research Materials

 

  • 1 Peter 3:1-7 Wives, in the same way be submissive to your husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, 2 when they see the purity and reverence of your lives. 3 Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. 4 Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight. 5 For this is the way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to make themselves beautiful. They were submissive to their own husbands, 6 like Sarah, who obeyed Abraham and called him her master. You are her daughters if you do what is right and do not give way to fear. 7 Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers. The Message paraphrases this passage as: The same goes for you wives: Be good wives to your husbands, responsive to their needs. There are husbands who, indifferent as they are to any words about God, will be captivated by your life of holy beauty. What matters is not your outer appearance—the styling of your hair, the jewelry you wear, the cut of your clothes—but your inner disposition. Cultivate inner beauty, the gentle, gracious kind that God delights in. The holy women of old were beautiful before God that way, and were good, loyal wives to their husbands. Sarah, for instance, taking care of Abraham, would address him as “my dear husband.” You’ll be true daughters of Sarah if you do the same, unanxious and unintimidated. The same goes for you husbands: Be good husbands to your wives. Honor them, delight in them.

 

1 Timothy 4:12 Don’t let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity. (NIV) The Message says: Get the word out. Teach all these things. And don’t let anyone put you down because you’re young. Teach believers with your life: by word, by demeanor, by love, by faith, by integrity. … Cultivate these things. Immerse yourself in them…Keep a firm grasp on both your character and your teaching. Don’t be diverted. Just keep at it.

 

GOD’S GOAL IS FOR WOMEN TO BE GODLY EXAMPLES OF SPIRITUAL MINISTRY (I Timothy 5:9, 14): That the New Testament required such a lifestyle for women is clear from the demands of 1 Timothy 5:9–10, 14: the wife of one man, having a reputation for good works, brought up children, shown hospitality to strangers, washed the saints’ feet, assisted those in distress, devoted to every good work, kept house, and given the enemy no occasion for reproach.

  • “brought up children” is A GODLY EXAMPLE OF SACRIFICE
  • “lodge strangers” is A GODLY EXAMPLE OF SERVICE
  • “washed saints feet” is A GODLY EXAMPLE OF HUMILITY
  • “relieved the afflicted” is A GODLY EXAMPLE OF COMPASSION
  • “following good works” is A GODLY EXAMPLE OF TRUE DEVOTION

 

 

 

 

I Timothy 4:12 Let no one despise your youth.  Paul lists 5 areas (the better Gr. manuscripts omit “in spirit”) in which Timothy was to be an example to the church:

  1. “word” (speech; cf. Matt. 12:34–37; Eph. 4:25,29,31); “In word” (1 Tim. 4:12) implies that our speech should always be honest and loving, “speaking the truth in love” (Eph. 4:15).
  2.  “conduct” (righteous living; cf. Titus 2:10;1 Pet. 1:15; 2:12; 3:16); In conduct” (the kjv’s “conversation” means “walk,” not “talk”) suggests that our lives are to be controlled by the Word of God. We must not be like the hypocrites Paul described to Titus (Titus 1:16): “They profess that they know God; but in works they deny Him.”
  3. “love” (self-sacrificial service for others; cf. John 15:13); “ “In love” (charity) points to the motivation of our lives. We do not obey God to be applauded by men (Matt. 6:1ff), but because we love God and love God’s people.
  4. (“In spirit” is not in many manuscripts, but it would describe the inner enthusiasm and excitement of a child of God.)
  5. “faith” (not belief, but faithfulness or commitment; cf. 1 Cor. 4:2); “In faith” implies that we trust God and are faithful to Him. Faith and love often go together (1 Tim. 1:14; 2:15; 6:11; 2 Tim. 1:13; 2:22). Faith always leads to faithfulness.
  6. “In purity” is important as we live in this present evil world. Ephesus was a center for sexual impurity, and the young man Timothy was faced with temptations. He must have a chaste relationship to the women in the church (1 Tim. 5:2) and keep himself pure in mind, heart, and body. “purity” (especially sexual purity; cf. 3:2). Timothy’s exemplary life in those areas would offset the disadvantage of his youth.

 

Watch out for the little things.  God wants you to be a psalm 15 man:

 

  1. HE KNOWS THE TRUTH v. 1 Spiritual integrity
  • worships: knows and learning more about God
  • passes God’s scrutiny, not man’s
  • knows the secret of communion with God
  1. HE INTERNALIZES THE TRUTH v. 2 Private personal integrity: Joseph Genesis 39:9-
  • daily way of life
  • deeds public and private
  • thoughts are pure
  • “walks with integrity”
  • “works righteousness”
  1. HE TALKS THE TRUTH. He is honest. v.2a -3a
  • “speaks truth in his heart”
  • “doesn’t slander with his tongue”
  1. HE LIVES THE TRUTH v.3b he is a loyal friend
  • “nor does evil to his neighbor”
  • “nor takes up a reproach against a friend”
  1. HE RESPECTS TRUTH. he has proper heroes. v. 4a
  • “in whose eyes a reprobate is despised”
  • “he honors those who fear the Lord”
  1. HE PROTECTS THE TRUTH. He can’t be bought. v. 4b-5
  • “he swears to his own hurt” = a man of his word
  • “he doesn’t put out his money at interest” = not take advantage of adversity in anothers life.
  • “nor take a bribe against the innocent” = he can’t be swayed from what is right.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

EXPOSITIONAL NOTES FROM SOURCES

 

The Younger Saints (Titus 2:4b-8)

  1. “To be discreet” (Titus 2:5) is our familiar word sober-minded again (“temperate” in Titus 2:2). Outlook determines outcome; and if a person is not thinking rightly, he will not act properly. A woman needs a correct and disciplined outlook on her ministry in the home. “Self-controlled” is the idea contained in this word. If parents do not discipline themselves, they can never discipline their children.
  2. “Chaste” means “pure of mind and heart.” A Christian wife is true to her husband in mind and heart as well as in action.
  3. “Keepers at home” does not suggest that her home is a prison where she must be kept! “Caring for the home” is the idea. “Guide the house,” Paul wrote (1 Tim. 5:14). The wise husband allows his wife to manage the affairs of the household, for this is her ministry.
  4. “Good” (Titus 2:5) can be translated “kind.” She does not rule her household with an iron hand, but practices “the law of kindness” (Prov. 31:26).

 

 

WORK LIFE: Christian Slaves (Titus 2:9–15)

 

  1. Paul warned these Christian slaves about three common sins they must avoid (Titus 2:9–10). First, They were to obey their masters and seek to please them, which meant going the extra mile. It is possible to obey, but not “from the heart” (Eph. 6:6). It is possible to do a job grudgingly. Some unsaved masters would not be thoughtful and would overwork their slaves.
  2. The second sin was talking back (“answering again,” Titus 2:9). While a slave would not carry this too far (his master might severely discipline him), he could argue with his master since the master probably knew less about the job than the slave did. The slave could also “gripe” about his master to others on the job. This would certainly be a poor testimony for a Christian slave.
  3. Christian slaves were also to avoid the sin of stealing (“purloining”). This was the sin Onesimus probably committed against Philemon (see Phile. 18). It would be easy for a slave to pilfer little items and sell them, and then report that they had been broken or lost.[5]

The Women—Submitting (1 Tim. 2:9–15)

The emphasis in this section (1 Tim. 2:9–15) is on the place of women in the local church. Paul admonished these believing women to give evidence of their submission in several ways.

Modest dress (v. 9). The contrast here is between the artificial glamour of the world and the true beauty of a godly life. Paul did not forbid the use of jewelry or lovely clothes, but rather the excessive use of them as substitutes for the true beauty of “a meek and quiet spirit” (see 1 Peter 3:1–6). A woman who depends only on externals will soon run out of ammunition! She may attract attention, but she will not win lasting affection. Perhaps the latest fashion fads were tempting the women in the church at Ephesus, and Paul had to remind Timothy to warn the women not to get trapped.

The word translated “modest” (1 Tim. 2:9) simply means “decent and orderly.” It is related to the Greek word from which we get the English word “cosmetic.” A woman’s clothing should be decent, orderly, and in good taste. “Shamefacedness” literally means “modesty, the avoidance of extremes.” A woman who possesses this quality is ashamed to go beyond the bounds of what is decent and proper. “Sobriety” comes from a Greek word that means “having a sound mind and good sense.” It describes an inner self-control—a spiritual “radar” that tells a person what is good and proper.

Ephesus was a wealthy commercial city, and some women there competed against each other for attention and popularity. In that day expensive hairdos arrayed with costly jewelry were an accepted way to get to the top socially. Paul admonished the Christian women to major on the “inner person,” the true beauty that only Christ can give. He did not forbid the use of nice clothing or ornaments. He urged balance and propriety, with the emphasis on modesty and holy character.

“It’s getting harder and harder for a Christian woman to find the right kind of clothes!” a church member complained to me one summer. “I refuse to wear the kind of swimsuits they’re selling! I simply won’t go swimming. Whatever happened to old-fashioned modesty?”

Godly works (v. 10). Paul did not suggest that good works are a substitute for clothing! Rather, he was contrasting the “cheapness” of expensive clothes and jewelry with the true values of godly character and Christian service. “Godliness” is another key word in Paul’s pastoral letters (1 Tim. 2:2, 10; 3:16; 4:7–8; 6:3, 5–6, 11; 2 Tim. 3:5; Titus 1:1). Glamour can be partially applied on the outside, but godliness must come from within.

We must never underestimate the important place that godly women played in the ministry of the church. The Gospel message had a tremendous impact on them because it affirmed their value before God and their equality in the body of Christ (Gal. 3:28). Women had a low place in the Roman world, but the Gospel changed that.

There were devoted women who ministered to Jesus in the days of His earthly ministry (Luke 8:1–3). They were present at His crucifixion and burial, and it was a woman who first heralded the glorious news of His resurrection. In the Book of Acts we meet Dorcas (Acts 9:36ff), Lydia (Acts 16:14ff), Priscilla (Acts 18:1–3), and godly women in the Berean and Thessalonian churches (Acts 17:4, 12). Paul greeted at least eight women in Romans 16; and Phebe, who carried the Roman epistle to its destination, was a deaconess in a local church (Rom. 16:1). Many believing women won their husbands to the Lord and then opened their homes for Christian ministry.[6]

 

Younger Women

  1. Love Their Husbands One word in the Greek text, philandros, is translated “love their husbands.” Paul used the same terms to describe godly widows (1 Tim. 5:9). It means to be a one-man woman, totally devoted to one’s husband.
  2. A Lover of Children This characteristic is also one word in the Greek text, philoteknos, and it means to be a lover of children. As we saw from our study of 1 Timothy 2:15, that is a woman’s highest calling. Obviously God doesn’t want all women to be mothers or they would be. Those women who have no children mean a great deal to God’s kingdom because He has given them freedom to serve in unique ways. God wants women who are mothers to love their children, which involves making personal sacrifices for the benefit of their children. Remember, loving your children is not based on emotion. Rather, it is your responsibility to pour yourself into your child’s life so that he or she grows up to love Christ.
  3. Sensible Young women are to be taught to be sensible, a required characteristic of elders (1 Tim. 3:2) and older men (Titus 2:2). It refers to using common sense and making sound judgments. Those things are learned best by example, and that’s where the older women can have such an influence.
  4. Pure Young women are to be morally pure, virtuous, and sexually faithful to their husbands. They are to be devoted to that one man in body and spirit.
  5. Worker at Home Titus 2:5 also says young women are to be “workers at home.” Since we examined this quality in depth in chapter 6, I’ll just reiterate this one thought: a woman’s responsibility is in the home because it is the place where she can have the greatest impact on the world by raising godly men and women.
  6. Kind A young woman ought to be characterized by being gentle, tender-hearted, and merciful toward others.
  7. Subject to Their Own Husbands This echoes Paul’s instruction in Ephesians 5:22. A godly young woman understands God’s created order and submits to it (cf. 1 Cor. 11:5).

 

YOUNG MEN

  1. Sensible Paul tells Titus to “urge the young men to be sensible; in all things” (vv. 6–7). We’ve seen Paul use this characteristic of elders, older men, and younger women. Young men need to develop self-control and balance, discernment and judgment (cf. 2 Tim. 2:22; 1 Peter 5:5). The phrase “in all things” at the beginning of Titus 2:7 fits better at the end of verse 6, for it stretches this matter of mental balance and self-mastery in the Christian life to an almost infinite level. Young men—so potentially volatile, impulsive, passionate, arrogant, and ambitious—need to become masters over every area in their lives.
  2. Example of Good Deeds Paul turns from the young men in general to encourage Titus to “show [himself] to be an example of good deeds.” One of the most important qualities of a leader is the example he sets. Paul wanted Titus to be a model first of “good deeds.” That refers to his inherent righteousness, nobility, and moral excellence. A godly young man is to model righteousness in everything he does. Young men, you’ll begin to control your life when you understand God wants you committed to producing righteous, holy deeds.
  3. Pure Motives “With purity in doctrine” (v. 7) is how God wants those deeds accomplished. A better way to translate the Greek word is “uncorruptness.” Titus and young men are to live in perfect accord with sound doctrine, and without defect. Young men must know the Word of God and live according to it. Psalm 119:9 says, “How can a young man keep his way pure? By keeping it according to Thy Word.” Living in obedience to God’s Word will keep you in line.
  4. Dignified At the end of Titus 2:7 Paul adds that Titus and young men are to be “dignified” —a characteristic that should also be true of men and women deacons and older men. That means young men are to be serious. Youth tends to be somewhat frivolous, particularly in our culture where entertainment has become an all-consuming passion. While that doesn’t mean young men can’t enjoy life, they should have a mature understanding of life, death, time, and eternity.
  5. Sound Speech Finally Paul encourages Titus to: “[Be] sound in speech which is beyond reproach.” As we’ve seen, “sound” means “healthy” or “wholesome.” In reference to one’s words, Paul wrote, “Let your speech always be with grace, seasoned, as it were, with salt, so that you may know how you should respond to each person” (Col. 4:6). Young men, let what you say be worth saying. Make sure it edifies your hearers to the point that it is “beyond reproach” —that the only accusations which can be brought against it are shameful in the light of reason.[7]

 

Peter, nearing the end of his ministry writes for God this inspired snapshot of what a gorgeous woman in God’s  sight looks like.  Its a timeless, never out of style, supra-cultural absolute.  This is what a woman of god has always looked like.  But watch out it is very different from the woman of the nineties, the woman of vogue, cosmopolitan, victorian and so on.  It cuts against the grain of culture and society. Well, what does god say a woman of godly virtue is to be? He gives a four part look:

 

  1. 1-2 in her actions she lines up with god’s plan for the church and the home. Thus, she is submissive.
  2. 3 in her adornment she looks like a woman in whom the Holy Spirit dwells, thus she is modest.
  3. 4 in her attitude she longs to offer god what he is looking for. Thus, she is gentle and quiet.
  4. 5-6 in her attention she is focused on the home. Thus, she is feminine.

 

Now, lets go thru these verses and see the Word of God explaining these truths.

 

  1. 1-2 IN HER ACTIONS she lines up with god’s plan for the church and the home. Thus, she is submissive. “observe”= a greek word that speaks of peering intently at anathletic event”

 

  1. 3 IN HER ADORNMENT she looks like a woman in whom the holy spirit dwells, thus she is modest. Ivbraiding hair” = the roman world custom of gold, gems and so on in towering displays of wealth. “putting on”= the only New Testament ref to the repeated changing of clothes to show great possessions. F.b. Meyer “the one law is to dress as becomes the station in which he has placed us, and in such a way as not to attract notice to ourselves.”

 

  1. 4 IN HER ATTITUDE she longs to offer god what he is looking for. Thus, she is gentle and quiet.  The seven characteristics of Titus 2:3-5 distinguish what a godly women is like:
    • She loves her husband= this is not agapao love that does the right thing no matter what one’s feelings are. This is phileo, the word describing the emotion of love.  It speaks of a friendship.  And, in this era it was even if she had no choice about him
    • She loves her children=this means positive feelings about them.even if she is only to bear her unsaved husband an heir…
    • Sober minded=balanced
    • Chaste=self restraint, purity
    • A worker at home=priority is at home
    • Kind=see the i tim 5:9-10 list below.
    • Submissive=voluntary acceptance of her divinely ordained role to her husband. See getz quote.
    • Why? That the word of god not be dishonored by Christians saying who cares what it says.

 

  1. 5-6 IN HER ATTENTION she is focused on the home. Thus,
  • She is feminine.
  • *”obeyed”=to listen to or attend another”
  • First Timothy 5:9-10 lists seven qualifications for a woman of god:
    1. Pure= one man sort of woman
    2. Faithful= reputation for good works
    3. Compassionate= nourished children= age of the abandoned child, orphans as well as own
    4. Loving=hospitable to strangers=inns notoriously filthy, expensive and immoral
    5. Humble= washed feet of saints
    6. Bold = helped those in trouble= Christians illegal?
    7. Focused = devoted to good works

 

 

[1]  John MacArthur, Different By Design, (Wheaton,: Victor Books) Chosen by God.

[2]  John MacArthur, Different By Design, (Wheaton,: Victor Books) Chosen by God.

[3] David Wilkerson, “A Manifestation of Jesus” MessiNews email 7-12-02.

 

[4] John MacArthur, Different By Design, (Wheaton,: Victor Books) Chosen by God.

[5]Wiersbe, Warren W., The Bible Exposition Commentary, (Wheaton, IL: Victor Books) 1997.

[6]Wiersbe, Warren W., The Bible Exposition Commentary, (Wheaton, IL: Victor Books) 1997.

[7] John MacArthur, Different By Design, (Wheaton,: Victor Books) Chosen by God.

 
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