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FTGC-19a

210415AM
WELCOME! It is Week #19 of our 2021 year-long Bible Journey with each of you going from Cover to Cover in the Scriptures. Bonnie & I are hosting this small group online for all who want an in-depth overview of Sacred history, Contextual background, Sacred geography, Vital Bible chapters, Vital theological doctrines, the Key Attributes of God, and all the Mega-themes of the Bible.
This week we do an overview of Proverbs and then dive into God’s plan that we not be alone in life. He said it is not good to be alone but to have a help meet suitable for us. That is His wonderful plan for most believers throughout most of history. Not only is marriage blessed by God, but it is also part of His plan for reaching the world.
God designed marriage as one of the most public displays of His plan and purposes for the world to see.
We are to go out and live in a dark and hopeless world, chasing after elusive pleasures, and never finding lasting satisfaction: and RADIATE Christ.

Transcript

It sure is a blessing to join you for this 19th week. John Barnett here, my wonderful wife Bonnie is over there running the sound, and the audio, and the recording. We are actually on the road. We taught three wonderful classes, theology classes, already today. At the end of the day, in fact I have to confess, I was so tired. I said honey, I’m not going to make it without a cup of coffee. So, I have to confess I had my vitamin C.

We’re studying, if you grab your Bible, the 31st chapter of Proverbs. This is our first time going into the book of Proverbs. I’ll do a little extra on the background. Proverbs 31, and you can see on the slide in front of you, we’re on week 19. We’re going through for 52 weeks this entire year, 2021, looking at the key chapters of the Bible. If you are just joining us, then just enjoy this class. If you ever want to catch up, I would go straight forward and just keep on with us, but whatever works. Our goal is to master the message, the theology of the key doctrines, the content, and the application of every chapter of the Bible. I’m only teaching you how to apply 52 key passages and chapters, but the method we use you can use in the whole Bible.

In fact, if you see my Bible, I actually have done this method through every chapter of the Bible and I’m continuing to do it. Even this morning, I was working away early this morning in the dark doing my study through one chapter, reading it, finding the lessons, and I even wrote out a prayer just like we’re all supposed to do. I do it every morning. I hope that you will find a time in the day you’ll just offer as a gift to the Lord. Start this journey of not only going through the word of God, but letting the word of God by the Spirit of God goes through your life, your heart. Why? Because Jesus said, “Sanctify them through thy truth; thy word is truth.” The way God makes us useful and makes us look like Jesus Christ is through the word of God.

Before we study we always pray, so just bow with me for a second.

Father in Heaven, I pray that You would open my eyes, and the eyes of everyone that are joining us in this study, to behold wonderful things from your word. In Jesus name, Amen.

Before we go on to the next slide, let me show you this. Proverbs 31 is a beautiful picture of God’s plan for marriage. Marriage is, look at this, the second greatest day of your life. I’ve said that as a pastor for four decades. Every time I’ve said that at a wedding, I’ve looked at the dear groom and the dear bride. As I look down at them, I smile. Then, I look beyond them out into the chapel or church filled with people. I say, welcome to the second greatest day in this dear couple’s life. In all 300 plus weddings that I’ve done over the years, the same thing happened. I enjoy watching it. People turn and they whisper to each other and they say, is this their second marriage? They are confused. I go right on and say, the first and greatest day, it’s the day I heard personally from each of these two wonderful bride and groom that are here professing their love for each other. The first and greatest day of their life was the day they met Jesus Christ. I launch right into sharing the gospel.

If you’re watching this video and you’re not even sure you’re going to keep watching, it could be you only came for one reason, the Lord Jesus Christ wants to knock on your heart’s door today. Have you ever received Jesus Christ? Have you ever had all of your sins removed from your past, everything you’ve ever done, felt guilty about, tried to hide, and blamed on someone else? All the ways we’ve fallen short from God’s glory today? Every sin until the last moment of your life? Do you know all those sins are on Christ right now? Have you ever called out to Him? That’s the first and greatest day of your life.

That’s the whole reason, by the way, that Bonnie and I even invest our evenings like this recording this study. We would like to invite you, if no one else has, to receive the implanted word which can save your souls, to get a new heart, and a new spirit only God offers that. He can give you a brand new operating system. He can change you little by little from the inside out. That’s what happened to me. That’s what happened to my wonderful wife, Bonnie. Both of us, if you could get us alone, we would spend time telling you about the greatest day in our life.

Let’s get into the word of God. Proverbs 31. As we look at the next slide we’re entering into a new type of literature. I took a picture of my Bible. There’s the book of Proverbs, this is the opening. You notice it says, The Proverbs of Solomon right there in verse 1 of the book. Remember, the key to understanding the message of any passage of scripture is knowing the context. Proverbs 31 is connected to the whole book of Proverbs and the theme of the whole book of Proverbs is living life God’s way. Today we’re going to explore just the last chapter, Proverbs 31.

The book of Proverbs, it’s the 20th book of 66 books in the Bible. The Bible’s made up of an Old and New Testament. 39 in the Old, 39 books making up the Old Testament. 27 in the New, 27 books in the New Testament. 66 total, making up the Bible. Proverbs has 31 chapters, 915 verses and contains the 513, look at this, key proverbs God wanted recorded of the 3000 proverbs Solomon spoke. That’s just a tiny little truth, the key doctrines of the Bible is part of what we’re going through for 52 weeks here. Did you know, not everything Solomon said was inspired scripture. Right? We all know that. Not everything Paul said, not anything John said, not everything Moses or David said. Everything Jesus said was the perfect flawless word of God. We are so thankful for all the words that are captured in the Gospels. We know in the book of Revelation what Jesus said, and the book of Acts. He’s recorded speaking in the four Gospels, Acts, and Revelation. Here’s something very important. God want us to know the proverbs that are in this book, so He inspired Solomon to write these for us.

The whole purpose of the book of Proverbs is to contrast God’s way with man’s way. The simple summary of the book is, God’s way is wisdom. In fact, in the New Testament, James 3:17, Jesus’ Earthly brother James wrote, “The wisdom that is from above,” the wisdom from God, “is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, willing to yield…” The wisdom that’s from beneath is earthly, central, demonic. There’s a contrast between man’s way, which is characterized by foolishness. It’s the wide way, everybody’s following, of the lost, people have empty minds, they’re spiritually dead, they’re calloused, they worshiped themselves. Proverbs declared that they mock at sin without the conviction of God. All of us were born into this world perishing, that’s what it says in Proverbs 20:24.

By the way, for a lost person, the pathway gets darker every day. I was just reading an interesting article about the famous youthful singer, Justin Bieber. I’ve never met him, but if what the article said is true, then something marvelous is happening to him. He looked right at this reporter and he said oh, I was living in sin. I was headed to destruction. He said, I got saved and my sins are forgiven. That’s a rarity by the way, to hear anybody, an entertainer say that. What captivated me was, Bieber said his pathway, even though he was making millions of dollars, had limitless drugs and alcohol, adoring fans, immorality, all and stardom and everything, he was getting darker and darker and darker and darker. He wasn’t very old. He’s, I think, 23? This is when he was like, what? 15, 14? I don’t know how old he was/is, it was the recent past. Someone, he shares at all in this article, someone shared the gospel with him. Look at this, when we’re saved, truly born again the way the Bible says, we start down the narrow way. We get the mind of Christ. We become spiritually alive. Sensitive. We worship God. We flee from sin. We’re being saved everyday more, and more, and more. More and more of our life is under the dominion of Jesus Christ through sanctification. Our path gets brighter every day. That’s the book of Proverbs, the big view.

Over the next six weeks, we’re having some of the best chapters in the Bible. Right here is where we are today, week 19, the godly husband and wife. Next time, fascinating, the fall of Lucifer. How Lucifer went from the greatest created being in the Universe, the most powerful being God ever made, to our adversary and God’s. Then, we look at Jesus, the Gospel in the Old Testament, suffering on the cross.

Then, we look at what sounds like this morning’s paper. I call it the paper cause I’m old. You know what I mean, news, online news. What it said is, it said Iran is running their centrifuges at 60% enrichment. They’re racing to get an atomic bomb. What would they want an atomic bomb for? We’ve got thousands of them here in America. We don’t use any of ours. What do they want one for? They don’t like the restored Israel and they are headed, God says, toward a final conflict. Do you know what triggers the end of the world? Iran, with Russia, attacking Israel. That is a huge, huge study. Lord willing, if the Lord doesn’t come back and take us home and I’m still alive in four weeks, we are going to have an incredible week studying the end of the world.

Then, Daniel 9, it’s the greatest prophetic passage in the Bible. If any passage could prove the veracity, the trustworthiness of God, the inspiration of the Bible, it would be the 9th chapter. It’s the most amazing prophecy of the details of everything that God has planned for the future. Then, we’re going to see right here, Zechariah 12 to 14. These are unbelievable chapters. Fascinating. The next six weeks are fascinating, Israel’s role in the end times.

Where we are, right here in Proverbs, this is amazing. We’re right at, what I would call, the middle of the Bible. Why? The way our English Bible was designed through the Hebrew Bible that Ezra, a few weeks ago we studied this, he divided the Bible into historical books, prophetic books, and other books, wisdom literature. There are five major, nine minor pre exile, and three post exile books of history. Same of prophecy. Five major, nine pre, five posts. Then, look at this, five wisdom books. We already studied many weeks ago a theology of godly suffering. Then Psalms. We’ve spent eight weeks in the Psalms. That’s the theology of godly worship, how we worship God through every part of life, mountain tops and the bottom of the pit like David often was.

Look right here. What we see is a theology of practical living. How does God want me to live today? Specifically in chapter 31, as a man, as a woman, as a husband, as a wife, as a child. There’s even a section as a leader. Practical living, not ethereal. Specifically, what is God’s will for me to show His wisdom? It’s going to be amazing to go through this chapter with you.

Ecclesiastes also written by Solomon. Solomon wrote these last three of the wisdom literatures. He wrote Proverbs at the height of his career, middle of his life. Ecclesiastes at the end of his life. He’s a bitter old man and saying, I have too many wives, and drank too much, and wasted my life. You shouldn’t, you should follow the Lord. Song of Solomon he wrote this at the beginning of his life. This would be number one, this would be number two, and this would be number three of the trilogy that Solomon wrote.

Look at verse 1. I just want to read it to you. “The words of King Lemuel.” Lemuel? I thought this was about Solomon. Again, the purpose of the scripture is to communicate the truth of God. When we study it the first law of textual interpretation is what did that mean to the Jewish people? You know what the Jewish people say? The most ancient Jewish comments on this chapter said, that was the word for Solomon. That this speaks of Solomon’s mother talking to him. See what it says? “The words of King Lemuel, the utterance which his mother taught him.” By the way, who was Solomon’s mother? Bathsheba, no less. We met her, David and Bathsheba, that whole study we did in 2 Samuel 11. “What, my son? And what, son of my womb? And what, son of my vows?” This is this mother he revered to the end of her life. This woman that saved the kingdom by Solomon going to her and saying, hey, don’t let this Adonijah become king. Solomon came and told her, with the prophet, to go to King David on his death bed and not let Solomon not become the king. This woman was used greatly in God’s plan. Forgiven. She is part of the family tree of Jesus Christ. You know what else? She was an incredible mother and she counseled the wisest man in the world, Solomon. That’s what these whole first nine verses are about in chapter 31. King Lemuel could be her nickname for Solomon. We don’t really know. We just know the Jewish people have always ascribed this chapter to Solomon and Bathsheba. That’s why we have a study Bible. You can read the whole article on that, that’s in the MacArthur Study Bible.

Look at what she counsels him. She says, verse 4, watch out “It’s not for kings to drink wine,” and get intoxicated, it clouds your judgment. Verse 6, “Give strong drink to him who is perishing.” There’s an incredible answer to people that are asking is it okay to use pain relievers? What about at end of life, and morphine, and everything else? Isn’t that a Class A drug? Did you know, God is merciful. He says there is a place for pain management, but don’t blow your mind and cloud your judgment with alcohol. We have a son and a mother. The son happens to be a king in the first nine verses.

Look at verse 10, “Who can find a virtuous wife? For her worth is far above rubies.” We’ve all heard that, that’s Proverbs 31. Most people think that’s all that’s in Proverbs 31. Actually, starting in verse 10, down to 31, is a 22 verse acrostic poem that was written right here in Solomon’s kingdom. See where we are? There’s Cyprus, Mediterranean Sea, modern day Greece, modern day Egypt. This, right here, is modern day Israel. Look how much bigger it was in Solomon’s time. Look at this, Israel was much larger than it is today. God promised them all that land and more if they would have obeyed Him. Sacred geography, everything happens somewhere. The proverbs were written right here in Solomon’s kingdom.

The proverbs were most likely also written, right here in the city of David, Jerusalem. In 1000 BC it became the capital of the people of the Lord, of the nation of Israel. This was David’s palace. What Solomon did is, he enlarged that palace and then up here built the temple on the spot that his father had sacrificed to the Lord on. Arunah’s threshing floor. That’s a little geographic look.

In sacred history we’re looking at Proverbs right here. It’s in this time Samuel records the birth of King Solomon, and 1 Kings talks about his reign. This right here is in the kingdom era, before the captivity, when Babylon and Assyria hauled away the children of Israel, and before the return after the captivity. You see right here, we’re in this section of sacred history.

Just for those of you, I know there’s one in every crowd, the people that just never get enough and want to do more, and more, and more study.

What is more study material that’s available for you? Bonnie and I have recorded the teaching of 22 books of the Bible. They are all YouTube playlists. If you go to our YouTube channel DTBM and look, there is a playlist for every one of these. Exploring Leviticus. Exploring Samuel. Exploring Psalms. Exploring Proverbs. Exploring Isaiah. Minor Prophets. Hebrews. Peter. Jude. Revelation. Of course, Revelation is the most popular one of all. It’s very, very interesting to a lot of people. If you would like to deepen your understanding of Proverbs, look, right there it is. I spend, in each of these courses, either 10, for most of them, or 20 for the larger books like Isaiah, Revelation, and the minor prophets class periods, with maps, and drawings, and the whiteboard, and everything else. Those are some extra resources if you’re interested.

Every day of this week, I read through this passage, and I spent time every day asking the Lord, just like we did at the beginning of the class, to open my eyes to behold wonderful things. Then, I jotted down in my notebook, that I’ve made with the whole course description and then all the chapters were covering in that notebook, it was my constant companion early in the morning, I wrote down everything I found. Then, I studied all the background material I could find. I looked up verses, and footnotes, and cross-references, and charts, and tables, and maps, and book introductions, and everything else I could find in the MacArthur Study Bible. I would encourage you to do that too.

Then, I record it. I wrote a title. You already had seen my one title, The Godly Husband and Wife. That was what was on the previous slide. You’ll see more titles, because each day, if I have a different kind of perspective on the chapter, I write a new title. Sometimes, I just keep the same title all week. It’s just whatever helps you learn. Then, I noted all the lessons. Then, I wrote that application prayer.

Here’s my journal. I want to show you what I’ve found. A godly husband and wife, I’ve already told you that was one title. A marriage and a family that God designed. To be honest, God’s the one who invented marriage, right? Hard to say that out loud nowadays. How to be a godly wife and husband. How to be a godly leader and follower. All that is in Proverbs 31. Here’s a summary. Solomon was the wisest man to ever live, of course apart from Jesus Christ. That’s what the Bible says. God used him to write this chapter to show us what a godly, wise, husband and wife looked like. That should be important to all of us. What does God want me to be as a husband? What does God want my wonderful wife, Bonnie, to be as a wife? What does God want you to become if you’re a young lady, what kind of a woman does He want you to become? If you’re a young man, what kind of a man does He wants you to become? He tells you He doesn’t leave you to try and navigate life alone with no map. He has written, distilled, divine wisdom.

I can’t believe how powerful the Proverbs are in my life. Personally, Bonnie and I read a proverb every day. Every day we read it out loud. We have devotions together every day. We’ve done that since the beginning of our marriage. Now, we specifically are reading through the Bible once each year. The MacArthur Daily Study Bible, which has a little description of each passage we’re reading and it’s a miniaturized study Bible. It takes about 15 minutes a day to read. We read the Old Testament, some Psalms and Proverbs, and some New Testament verses. Then, it has a little devotional. Proverbs is so powerful. It’s like maple syrup. It’s distilled down truth that you just love to feel the wisdom of God by accepting His word. I would encourage you to become a lover of the Proverbs.

Proverbs 31 is an acrostic poem. What does that mean? The first verse starts with Aleph, the letter A in English. The second verse starts with the letter Beth in Hebrew, which is B. It goes Aleph, Beth Gimel, Daleth, He, Waw, Zayin, Heth, Teth, Yod, it goes through the whole Hebrew alphabet. What acrostic means is that the first-line of each verse starts with a succeeding letter of the Hebrew alphabet. It’s masterful to see in Hebrew, to see the beauty, the symmetry, and the ingenious that God built into His word. There are many acrostic poems in the scripture. In fact, the densest one is the book you’ve heard of, Lamentations. It’s made up of seven, 22 verse, acrostic poems. You say oh, there are only five chapters. Chapter 1, chapter 2, chapter 4, chapter 5 are the single 22 verse poems. Chapter 3 has 66 verses, it’s three poems. You see, there’s seven. It’s just part of the Hebrew way of communication.

The virtues of a godly wife and mother, summarize the wisdom God tells us is the best way to live; by hard work, wise financial investments, wise time investments, planning, helping others. All this is in that Proverbs 31 woman section. All of those trues and the proper relationship to God, his profile. We worship Him, trust Him, serve Him, obey Him. Fearing God, do you remember from that opening chart I showed you, equals living wisely. There are only two choices on the shelf, pleasing God… wisdom, fearing Him, obeying Him… or my way, which is foolish, and fallen, and sinful, and going astray, and following the god of this world. There are only two choices. Proverbs profiles the contrast between those.

Here are the lessons I found. Verses 1-9, the godly, a.k.a. wise, leaders like kings and husbands watch out for the dangers of alcohol. It distorts judgment, verse 5. It’s okay to help with pain, verses 6-7. These wise men also care for the poor and the helpless. Now remember, that’s most likely Bathsheba telling Lemuel, which is Solomon her son, but because it’s in Proverbs it’s inspired. That means it’s truth that can transform our lives.

Next in verses 10 and 11 I found, a godly, wise, wife is a lifelong special treasure to her husband. By the way, do you know what the Bible says? We’ll see it in a minute in Proverbs. It says a wise husband praises his wife in the gates. What does that mean? In public. He lets people know what he thinks of his wife, that she is a gift from God. I’ve taught this study for years, this 52 chapters study. Do you know what’s happened to me over the years? I was just telling Bonnie this the other day. I said honey, just going through this study reminds me of how many times I would be walking around the local church where I was pastoring, carry my Bible between services, and a woman would stop me and say, excuse me. I say, yes? Can I help you? She’d look around. She would say, what have you been telling my husband in your Bible study? I would try to not grin too widely. I’d say, why? What’s he doing? She said, the other day I said to him, are you leaving me? Are you dying of cancer? You have changed so much. I said, why? What did he do? She said, he starting to write me notes. He’s starting to say, he wants to read the Bible to me. He starting to say, he wants to pray with me. He actually wants to go for walks with me and turns the television off. She said, it’s getting a little confusing, it’s hard. She said, he hasn’t been around for years. She says, I just can’t resist him. How do you say no to a husband who wants to pray with you? Do you know what that is? That’s the power of the word of God. A godly wise wife is a lifelong special treasure to her husband. Husbands, we need to believe that. We need to start saying that.

Verse 12, a godly, wise, wife works hard at caring for a family and household. You know all that, you’ve heard enough Mother’s Day sermons. That’s what God extols; He elevates. What I used to say is, any godly woman in the world can elevate the most menial, mundane task of life to eternal reward by obeying the Lord. That means you can wash dishes for the glory of God. You can fold clothes for the glory of God. You can change diapers for the glory of God. You can go to the grocery store and buy food to keep your household fed, and clothed for the different seasons, and everything else. Make your home a glorious place as Titus 2 says, as a homemaker. You can still have a marvelous life of being a businesswoman, being this creative craft maker, a property owner. God says what a godly woman can do is limitless. It’s a lot of work, but it’s unlimited reward, if she’ll do it… whether she eats, or drinks, or whatever she does around the home for the glory of God.

Verses 16 to 19 says, a godly wife is a wise investor and businesswoman. Did you know that on a flat, equal playing ground a Christian always will do better than an unsaved person. I don’t mean if this person is an Olympic trained athlete and you’ve never trained, you won’t do better in sports than them, but on a level playing field where you’re equal in your physical abilities and your mental abilities and everything else, a Christian will always do better. Why? Because God lives inside of us. He empowers us. He gives us wisdom. His Spirit energizes us. He changes our personality. He gives us boldness. Just think of what God can empower. I’m amazed all the time, I tell my wife all the time, she is amazing. I’m not going to embarrass her because she might turn off the recording but what I see is, I really believe what Proverbs says. My wife is priceless beyond rubies, and amazing, and wise, and godly, and a very, very wonderful reflection of Christ.

Verse 20, a godly wife cares about the poor with compassion. I’ll give you an example. Every time we’re driving through the inner city of any part of this country or even overseas and we see one of those homeless people that stands really close to the side of the road with the sign. Have you ever seen them holding those signs? My wife is reaching down into her purse. She always keeps her purse right there and she’s reaching down. I can see her wrestling and I slow the car down because I know what’s coming. She’s finding in her purse a Gospel track and a dollar bill. We’re not walking, she doesn’t have granola bars. Some people have water, and food, and everything, but we’re traveling. She puts that dollar in the Gospel message and as we’re getting close, she rolls the window down. She says here. She said, I have some money for you, but more important than the money is the Lord Jesus Christ who offers salvation to you. Have you ever met Jesus Christ? Depending how long the light lasts is how far she goes with the Gospel. Why? She cares about the poor. She has compassion.

Number six, a godly wife is a careful planner. It talks about her planning.

Number seven, a godly wife, enjoys beautiful things and makes fine items. There’s something about God that loves beauty, and color, and intricacy, and symmetry, and orderliness. He loves planning and he loves all that. This godly woman excels. Now of course, not every woman is an Etsy crafts person and a gourmet cook, but every woman can be this godly reflection by the grace of God. God offers it.

Number eight, a godly wife wears strength, honor, and speaks with the law of kindness. That’s true. I would say that about my wonderful wife. Unbelievable strength, unbelievable honoring, loving people, and speaking with the law of kindness.

The only way a godly wife can do all this, she’s disciplined. By the way, that is a fruit of the Spirit. Self-discipline is something God’s Spirit, the more He controls, the more He brings about in our life, the more we surrender to Him.

A godly, wise, wife gets blessed by her children. Look at verse 28. It says, “Her children rise up and call her blessed.” Look at verse 28 men, “Her husband also, and he praises her.” Then these next verses are most likely the content of the praise. “Many daughters have done well, but you excel them all,” wonderful wife. “Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing, but a woman who fears the LORD, she shall be praised.” You’ll receive the fruit of your hands, and your own works will praise you in the gates.

A godly wife, her life testifies God’s plan, and her husband praises her character.

From that I wrote a prayer. This is just part of our class, and this is part of our small group. You all are our small group. I know it gets old, but I would like to say thank you. I get notes from you all. You say, I’m praying, I’m part of your small group. I just got one today, let’s see, got more than one. One said, I’m in your small group in Ireland. That was one and another one said, I am in your small group. I actually had to Google their address; they included their address. They live in Queensland. Which I think if I found it right on the map, Australia’s like this, and Brisbane is up here, and then Sydney’s here, and then Melbourne’s down here, and they were somewhere, I think, around Melbourne. I don’t know quite where they were, but God is hearing their prayers.

Let me pray, as accountability to you. This is what the Lord did in my heart. This is the one I wrote this morning. The last one is the one I write at the end of my study when I’m getting ready for you. When I’m getting ready to sit across the table from you. That’s what I think of in my mind, at a coffee shop somewhere. This is what I wrote and let me pray.

Lord. I want to live Your wisdom from above. That’s what James 3:17 says. Keep me from anything that clouds my mind. Help me to have compassion for the poor and helpless. Lord, You show us the right way to live. You tell us the path that leads to life in its fullness that You want us to have. Help me to seek Your wisdom, surrender to Your plan, and live wisely all my days. Thank you for my wise, creative, godly, amazingly resourceful wife, partner, and best friend. Help me to praise her godly and wise character all my days in the gates of life. For Jesus’ sake, Amen.

That’s the essence of what this chapter did to me after reading it today and after spending all week, like I’m praying you’re going to do this week.

Real quickly, let me apply this before we go. God designed marriage as one of the most public displays of His plan and purpose for the world to see. If any of you are millennials, Gen Z, college, young professionals. You’ve probably never heard this before. God wants you to be a living, public display, of His plan. We are to go out and live in a dark and hopeless world chasing after illusive pleasures, that’s planet Earth today. They never find lasting satisfaction. We’re supposed to go out there radiating Christ.

Do you realize God has said, it’s not good for you to be alone. Any of you that are alone and feel loneliness, you agree with Him. You know what God wants you to do? God wants you to read Proverbs, see what a godly woman looks like, and start pursuing one. You’ve got to be selective and aggressive. You’ve got to pick one that knows the Lord, loves the Lord, is seeking the Lord, and you aggressively pursue her. Tell her, you know the Lord, you love the Lord, and you’re going to follow His plan that He wrote down. In fact, you ought to do a study of the book of Proverbs as a man and see everything God says a godly man looks like. There are dozens of Proverbs about that and everything that a godly woman is like. There are dozens of verses. You should be looking for the one that’s like that and being the one that’s like that. Vice versa for women. You should see what a godly man looks like. By the way it doesn’t talk anything about his muscles, his money, his tan, anything. It’s all about his character. All about the words he speaks. All about discipline in his life. That’s what lasts. For a lasting marriage on Earth and for eternal blessing God designed marriage to be that.

How can we be this kind of glowing, radiating picture of Christ? By sanctification. What’s sanctification? “Sanctify them by Your truth. Your word is truth,” John 17:17. It’s building our lives on the scripture. It’s obeying the scripture. It’s inviting God to change my life. To conform me to His will, which He’s written down. Basically, God wants you and I to have a life and a marriage that’s useful to God. Do you know what marriage is? It’s one of the most sanctifying relationships. I can tell you that, for the last 38 years of my wonderful marriage to Bonnie, she has been the greatest influence on me, in my life, of any human being ever. More than any teacher. More than any faculty member. More than my parents. She has influenced my life the most. Why? She prays for me. She reads God’s word. She lets God change her life. She shares, as my very best friend, areas in my life, number one that need to change and she very lovingly reminds me of God’s truth. Even more than that, she encourages me whenever she sees something God’s doing in my life. She just says wow, I see that. I am so thankful, and we share life together, sanctifying one another. That’s why we read the Bible together. That’s why we pray together. We want to be useful to God. I hope you want to be useful to God.

What’s a biblical marriage and partner really like? Just to go through all the Proverbs, marriage is supposed to be like a joyful river of intoxicating blessing. Marriage is goodness and favor from the Lord. Marriage is to be the companion of our youth, to whom we make a lifelong covenant to. You only get one chance to have a godly Christian marriage. You know what the blessing is? If you failed, if you’re watching this right now and you’re about ready to turn it off, God does forgive. God does offer us a new beginning. But, you know what? You have a broken marriage and it’s like broken glass on a tile floor in your kitchen. It’s a long time of sweeping, and wiping, and picking up, and finding pieces. It’s hard when a marriage is broken. God says, marry the companion of your youth and chase her all your days.

A biblical marriage is to be such a wonderful attraction. By the way, the seven years of hard labor waiting for marriage was like a moment to Jacob. Seven years, wow. He wasn’t, sleeping with her. He was chaste and virtuous. God gives grace. I don’t advocate seven year engagements. I think that you should be engaged as long as it takes to get ready for the wedding. Of course, you shouldn’t marry someone that you don’t know and you haven’t found out about, but get married. Don’t wait. When you have long engagements, it’s like people that drive with their foot on the brake and the foot on the gas, it’s just ruining everything and that’s what it’s like. Marriage has to be like a fruitful vine that delightfully grows. Every day of your marriage actually gets better. I can confess to you, today was perhaps one of the most wonderful days of marriage I’ve experienced in all the thousands, that Bonnie and I have shared.

God wants and here’s the essence of marriage what proverb says resonates from cover to cover, from Genesis to Revelation. Everything that describes marriage is resonating in the book of Proverbs because that’s distilled wisdom. Let me show you how the New Testament applies what Proverbs says. God wants husbands who reflect Christ’s love for His Church. The key passage, by the way that’s one of the key chapters we’re going to study in the future, God wants husbands to reflect Christ.

How do husbands reflect Christ’s love for His Church? How does Christ love the Church? Christ loves us every day. Christ sacrifices for us. He cleanses us with the washing of water by the word. He affirms, nurtures, protects, pursues, and never gives up. What does a godly Christ reflecting husband look like? It isn’t a lot of money. It isn’t buying a lot of gifts. It isn’t spraying a lot of cologne. It’s not showing off and shining the car. There’s nothing wrong with all those things, but what God wants more than all those externals is something on the inside. Biblical, godly character that is genuinely the love of God shed abroad in our hearts, genuinely agape love. Do you know what that is? It’s not a feeling. It’s a choice. It’s sacrificial. When God says, love your enemies it isn’t phileō, emotional. Oh, I just have the feeling, I just feel this love for you. No, you can’t feel love for your enemies, but you can love them. How? By choosing to sacrifice for them. You know what marriage is all about? Chosen sacrificial love.

There’s a lot of emotional love, and phileō love, and friendship love, but underneath it all, what keeps the marriage going is that Christ like sacrificial love cleansing us. I have to make sure that I confess and forsake my sin. I have to remember the nine most important words of every marriage. You know what they are. I was wrong. I am sorry. Please forgive me. That’s the cleansing. We do not let sin, and hurt, and resentment build. Every day “don’t let the sun go down on your wrath.” That’s what a godly husband is like. Christ affirms us, affirm your wife. Tell her that you love her. She’s wonderful. You can’t live without her.

He nurtures us. Sometimes I don’t feel like reading or praying and Bonnie says come on, honey, I’ll read and let me pray. Sometimes she doesn’t, but we nurture, we encourage one. Another, Christ protects us, I protect Bonnie. He pursues us, I’ll never stop pursuing my wife. He never gives up on us, we never give up on one another.

God desires, wives who reflect Christ’s love for His Church to their husbands. That’s what it says in Ephesians 5.

How do wives reflect Christ’s love? How does the Church respond to Christ? We follow Christ. We honor Christ. We respond to what Christ says. We long to be in Christ presence. We follow His leading. We feel His love. We seek to spend time with Him. And we love His plan. This is not popular. This is not current sentiments in the English speaking world or anywhere else in the world. This is what God designed a woman to find her greatest joy in marriage to be, following their husband as they follow the Lord. That’s why you should marry a Christian because if you marry a Christian, he’s following the Lord and you’re follow him. When your husband’s not following the Lord, you don’t get angry at him. You talk to the Lord and say hey, work on him. Then, you lovingly encourage men. By the way, men need a lot of encouragement.

We honor our husbands. I don’t want to get off the track here, but women, the power you have to decimate your husband in front of people, in private. The Bible says that men are supposed to respect their wives lovingly and wives are supposed to, as it says in Ephesians 5, respect their husbands. Husbands sacrificially love, and wives respect and tell him I know you’re trying hard, and I honor what you’re doing. I want to respond to it. Don’t decimate him by criticizing his feeble attempts. Enjoy his presence. By the way, a godly wife wants to spend time with her husband more than with her children, her mother, her sisters, or best friends. Wives are supposed to be best friends to their husbands. We’ll cover that more in Titus. Follow his lead. Feel his love. Seek time with him, and love his plan. That’s how the Church responds to Christ. That’s how Christ says a wife responds to her husband.

God’s plan for marriage, that’s the second greatest day of your life, is beautifully illustrated for us in the book of Proverbs.

This chapter is a part of our devotional, finding the word of God. I hope you do that this week. Then, eating it by meditating on it, and taking notes, and marking your Bible, and finding lessons and truths. Then, being transformed by that prayer of application each day. Don’t wait all week, every day. Most of all, identify with the Lord. Say, it’s Your word. I’m your child. You live within me. I want to respond to you. God’s plan for marriage, the second greatest day of your life.

I hope that you will remember us. We’re on the road right now. We’re serving the Lord. Pray for us if you think about it. In fact, if you’ve never quite taken the time, think about the fact that you participate, by prayer, in all that we do. The Bible says those that go get equal share with those that stay. Hold the ropes for them and help them by praying for them. That’s what we’re counting on.

I hope you have a great week in Proverbs 31, and I can’t wait until next week when we go through one of the most fascinating chapters in the Bible. Until then, God bless you. Have a great week in the Lord.